Thinking Again About Pornography

I've been thinking again about pornography. I say again, because I wrote on this blog a year ago about the dangers of porn. I still believe as I did then, that pornography is an insidious evil, a trap that people get caught in, and the more they struggle to escape this deceitful web, the more entrapped they become.

The reason I'm writing about this again, is because of a link that I believe can be drawn from porn use to childhood sexual abuse. In my conversations with men who have been involved as perpetrators of sexual abuse toward children and adolescents, I have noticed that in most cases, the men who have abused have previously been involved in pornography. Why might this be the case? I believe that men who view pornography become addicted, and as that addiction escalates, it becomes more and more difficult for the sexual addict to limit the acting out of their addiction strictly to the virtual. When I speak of "virtual," I mean those images one views on the internet, or on the TV screen. What one indulges in virtually eventually will be acted out in real life. Hence, I believe that men who are addicted to porn, will eventually cross the line into real life violations.

Men who abuse their children and other family members fact the very real possibility of legal consequences, such as being separated from their children, and possibly probation and/or prison sentences, not to mention the painful emotional consequences of adult children who later break off communication with their parents over such violations.

I realize that what I am writing sounds dire indeed, but if you are reading this and you are addicted to pornography, please know that what you may believe is personal and private now, may very likely express itself in a more public and painful way in the future. If you are a sexual addict, there is help available. Please don't wait until you have violated trust and boundaries in your family to seek resolution.

Tom Horst, MA
Marriage and Family Therapist