Monday, September 19, 2011

Feeling Needed

One of the things that older people often state about their lives is that they no longer feel useful to anyone. My 84-year-old father struggles with this. He lives next door to me and if I am home I will visit him in the evening and watch Jeopardy with him. We will usually talk about the day and the activities that we did. My day is normally very busy and his is quite the opposite. Some days he will have done nothing except stay at home and watch TV and listen to music and read. The days get long and he has no one to talk to and no where to go. There is no one who really needs him. I know that my 1/2 hour visits with him are often the highlight of his day and I try to encourage him, however, words just can't compensate for the real deal sometimes.

On Saturday, I was mowing my yard for the first time since Tropical Storm Lee. We have a creek that runs through our property and it was still quite wet and muddy. I intended to stay away from it, but I misjudged and before I knew it I was stuck in mud halfway up my tires. There was no way I was going to get out of this mess myself. I was in despair because no one was home to help me and I had barely gotten started mowing my huge yard.

My dad has trouble walking but he still mows yard and he often uses his lawnmower as a means of transportation to get from his house to mine. I wondered if he could possibly help me out of my predicament. "I'll be right there," he said when I called him. I waited, doubtfully, yet hopefully. He soon arrived on his lawnmower with a chain in tow that he kept stored in his garage. Keeping his lawnmower clear of the mud we hooked one end of the chain to his mower and the other end to mine. He began to pull forward and miraculously my lawnmower followed and was soon safe on solid ground. I was so happy and grateful. As I thanked him profusely he said, "You have no idea how good it feels to be useful. This just made my day and possibly my week."

Everyone needs to feel useful, and it is especially important for older people as they struggle with difficulties that come with aging. Now, I don't recommend that you go get a lawnmower stuck so they can help you out, but I encourage you to watch for things that an elderly person could do for you. You will be blessed and so will they.

~ Mary Lehman

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