Thanks, Mom and Dad, for Loving Each Other

I’ve been thinking about my parents lately, most likely because yesterday was Mother’s Day and Father’s Day isn’t far away. On Mother’s Day, my lovely wife, Thelma, and I, had dinner with my 92 year-old Dad and also took him for a drive to see Mother’s grave in Brecknock Township, Lancaster County. Mom died a little over two years ago. On the way back to Dad’s home we also stopped at Thelma’s Mother’s grave near Ephrata. It was a poignant time of remembrance and reflection.

Recently I was bicycling with some friends in Juniata County. The group numbered about 20 people, some of whom I did not know prior to the weekend event. We were sitting in a little restaurant eating Italian food and getting “refueled” for the return ride to the cabin where we were staying. One of the ladies in the group said to me, in the course of conversation: “You must come from a really happy family.” She said this partly because two of my sisters were accompanying the group as hostesses, cooking and providing support for the riders and she saw how my sisters and I related to each other. I thought a few moments on how to respond to Jane, the rider’s, statement about my family. I said to her, “Well, I think one of the most important memories I have about my Mom and Dad is that they loved each other. There was never any doubt about that, and their love for each other provided the security we needed as kids growing up.”

And so I say to my parents today: “Thanks, Mom and Dad, for loving each other. That provided a stable backdrop for my siblings and me to grow up and launch out into the world.” As a young boy growing up in their home, my parents provided me with a great example of how a husband and wife can love each other and live together in peace and harmony, giving most of their attention to loving each other and their kids, rather than expending emotional energy in fighting, arguing and sabotaging each other. That, truly, was a priceless gift our parents gave to us. 

Tom Horst, MA

Marriage and Family Therapist