Two Main Tools from God's Toolbox

Walking through life in this world can sometimes be very difficult, especially if we either choose to "go it alone" or we feel cut off or far away from our heavenly Father. This distance can be from unhealed hurts we carry within, or from our own waywardness and independence which hasn't yet been fully surrendered to Jesus. God wants to heal us from all our hurts, and He wants to guide us back to a strong and positive loving relationship with Him.

We know this is true because the Scriptures tell us that Jesus died for our sins, by actually becoming sin in the Father's sight, while He endured the agony of separation for all of us on His cross at Calvary. The Bible also says that Jesus bore our "griefs and sorrows" - the damage done to us by the sinfulness of people in our lives, that has caused hurt and destruction in our attitudes and behaviors toward ourselves and others, even effecting our relationship with God.

God will bring us close to Him by covering all of those sins, turning us to His ways, and healing those hurts. He also gives us many tools or ways to reach out to Him and for Him to reach back into our lives and hearts. We are called to grow and learn of these ways and use these tools to help us come closer to Him as well.

Fasting and Prayer are two incredible ways our Lord Jesus has modeled for us in His life as a human person here on the earth. He has given them to us as tools to enter more fully into the Presence of God through His Holy Spirit.

He has given us these particular tools for many reasons. When we are fasting and praying, we are surrendering ourselves to the Lord. We are laying down:

1. the many distractions of our minds, which are filled with futile thinking;
2. strongholds that raise themselves up against the knowledge of God;
3. the deceitfulness of our hearts, which harbor unfaithfulness and faithlessness;
4. our wayward wills, which are constantly seeking self-fulfillment in all the wrong places.

God's love covers the multitude of our transgressions. It also provides for us His way of escape out of these traps that ensnare us and hold us back from Jesus and from the full freedom of His Spirit!

As we learn and grow to be more like Jesus through this consistant surrender, it actually causes real changes in who we are and the way we operate. It enables us to receive greater grace in the fullness of the Holy Spirit and to see more of His will and His ways. We begin to see the true nature of who we are becoming in our thoughts, feelings, and actions, and we more fully recognize His workings in the world around us and in the people He has sent us to live among and serve. Through loving Jesus, we will in time, love those around us  more than ourselves.

Death to self is then engulfed by the greater life Jesus offers to us, as we are compelled by increasing faith to become more like Him. We become less connected and less tempted or controlled by our sinful natures or by others that are still part of the world system and under the darkness of ignorance or outright rebellion. This entrance into eternal and resurrection life is not something waiting for us after our physical deaths, but is happening right now within us and around us. Fasting and Praying opens our eyes, minds, and hearts to the spiritual reality of what God is actually doing!

Fasting and Prayer are only two of the many ways that the Lord has given us to remain on the right path and to find Him daily. It allows us to be with Him and in Him constantly as we set ourselves to draw near to Him.

~Neil Uniacke, MC
Executive Director

It's the Most Wonderful, er...Stressful Time of the Year!

It's that time of year for family get-togethers with lots of food, gift-exchanges and other festivities. We're busy decorating and baking and shopping. There are special church services and school plays and community programs to attend. In other words, it's the most not-so-wonderful-but-actually-quite-stressful time of the year.

In addition to the general stress, the Christmas season is often a difficult time for many folks. Some of my clients struggle with heightened depression and anxiety. Loneliness is exacerbated for those who've lost loved ones or experienced a divorce or geographically moved during the year. Financial stress creates conflict in marriages. And there's pressure...pressure to be happy and wish strangers a "Merry Christmas" when a person actually feels like snapping in irritation or crying in despair.

If you're stressed or discouraged, may I make a few suggestions for how to navigate the holiday?

1. Take time to sit, rest and breathe. I find the loveliest and calming things to do after a crazy day is to sit in our living room with just the lights of the tree, sipping a cup of tea and cuddling under a blanket with my husband while the dogs lay at our feet. Sometimes we play Christmas music, sometimes we just talk, but it's soothing to take a break and remember to not just get ready for Christmas, but actually "take it in."

2. Say "no" to non-essentials. If you're invited to attend or do more than you can possibly do in the time you have available, than cut out those things that aren't necessary. I'll let you in on a secret...I decided several years ago that Christmas cards don't need to be sent every year...I send mine out every other year. And believe it or not, some people don't send them at all. Not every party or program or service needs to be attended.

3. Choose your own priorites. Several years ago, there was a bad snow storm on Christmas day and my husband and I stayed home for the first time in our marriage. It was a restful and lovely time for us. We read, watched movies, made homemade soup and celebrated quietly just the two of us. Ever since then, we're not afraid to decide how we want to enjoy our day. Sometimes going to a family or church event is our priority, but we have also chosen to stay home and replicate our "snow storm Christmas." Take time to choose your own priorities and boundaries.

4. Look for ways to get "centered." When we prioritize well, a person feels less chaotic and more stable. What we choose to do with our time around the holidays (or any time) creates balance or imbalance. I encourage my clients to structure routines that "center" them. A weekly worship service to praise our Lord, a morning quiet time, an evening stroll around the block...all these activities build stability. At Christmas, centering may come through family traditions or by developing one that incorporates the true reason for the season. Look to put something sacred into the holiday. Read the Christmas story, attend a candlelight vigil, take the kids Christmas caroling to your elderly neighbors and as you do so take time to ponder the blessing of Christ come to Earth.

My hope is that your Christmas is full of His light and life. Merry Christmas!

~Shannon Shertzer, MS, NCC

JESUS: Ultimately Our Only Hope

If anyone has ever felt truly hopeless, they know what a horrible feeling it is, and an awful place to be. I have found myself in that place at various points in my own personal journey. Each time, my heart and mind was overwhelmed by a gnawing hopelessness within me.

It was not that everything in my life suddenly got worse, but that I had allowed the burdens of worry and weariness to overtake my thoughts and feelings to the point that I did not care whether I lived or died. I would never purposely do harm to myself, but I had a sense that it just didn't make any difference if I existed or not.

To move below the basic human instinct to survive and give up on life is the saddest place to go, and one of the worst to stay in for any length of time. It usually happens through negative circumstances and/or negative perceptions seeming to pile on top of us, with our hopes being crushed as we realize that there seems to be nothing to hold onto or worth living for.

We find ourselves attempting to place our trust in various people or things that just don't live up to our expectations, and when they fail us we are thrown more deeply into despair. We begin to negatively identify ourselves as the problem, or to shift blame onto everyone and everything else.

Some of this is actually the result of forces way beyond our control, but some is because of decisions we have made for ourselves personally or in the way we have connected with others in dysfunctional patterns, and finally, some of this is just because we live in a fallen world that is not able to sustain our needs and desires in the ways we had hoped it would.

The last point is actually the steppingstone toward moving from hopelessness to true hopefulness. We must realize that every time we place our trust in someone or something in this world, we risk losing hope! It would be a very amazing thing for anyone to trust the things of this world and never be disappointed. For most of us, this has proved impossible.

When we have hit our heads enough against the brick wall of trusting, failure, and hopelessness, we finally come into the realization or revelation that there ultimately is only one Hope in this world: Jesus, our Hope of Glory, who desires to meet us wherever we find ourselves when we have no hope left, and then to become the Hope we can learn to know, and receive to grow within us.

When all else has failed, we are ready to really trust in a way that we do not naturally allow ourselves as long as there is just one more other thing to hold onto, whether a relationship, a job, some money in the bank, or whatever we choose to fill in that great big empty blank space within every one of us. Jesus is always here with us and for us, but we have to clear out the other distractions and really focus on Him as our only Hope able to carry us through the tough times in this life.

The toughest time of all is as we approach the end of our time here on the earth. This is when we are forced to see the stark reality that everything else around us is not able to sustain us, but feels as if it is shutting down and we are fading away. We see in this time that as the Bible tells us, "naked came I into this world and naked will I go." It is this time especially that we are freely invited with every difficulty within us and around us to put our hearts fully on eternity where our endless, boundless, infinite Hope, Jesus, awaits us in all His Glory!

Neil Uniacke, MC
Executive Director

Thanksgiving Season

The Thanksgiving  season was especially meaningful in our home this year. My husband was in a serious accident in September and has been recovering since that time from a head injury. While I have always been thankful for my family, this year I was again reminded of how special my family is to me. My husband and I were also thankful for the support and love that we were shown during this time in our life. Most of all, we are thankful that we know that God is walking through this season with us and He knows all that has happened and all that will happen.
A head injury can often result in both physical and emotional injuries. As a result of his accident, my husband is now going to counseling to help overcome some of these difficulties. We researched the best place for him to go for counseling, and found a group that comes from a Christian perspective and deals with neurological trauma. The process is often slow but I believe that the final outcome will be so worthwhile.
God's love has truly amazed me during this season of our lives. As difficult as this had been to go through, I knew that I could rest in the loving arms of God and He would carry me through when it became too difficult for me. I am giving Him the glory for this season of our lives and I am so thankful to God for walking with me.

~Deb Riddell
Thrift Store Manager

Thanksgiving

As we look forward to Thanksgiving with all of the trimmings, let us be mindful of ALL of the things God has given us to be thankful for. We often get caught up in a mindset of what we don't have or what we could have or what we want that we forget to give thanks for the things we do have. So often we "wish" our life away wanting things that in retrospect have no real meaning nor do they make us truly happy. Jesus reminds us of this in Matthew 6:25-34.

Do not be worried about the food and drink you need to stay alive, or about clothes for your body. After all, isn't life worth more than food ? And isn't the body worth more than clothes?...So do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings. ~ Good News for Modern Man

Perhaps instead of dwelling on our own wants, we should look at how we can be an encouragement to others. Look at your neighbor. Perhaps what has happened to you in your life this year doesn't sound as bad when you hear what has happened to your neighbor. Or, do you even know anything about your neighbor? I remember as a child our house was where all the neighborhood kids hung out...it is so sad that I don't see that happening as much any more.

Make it a priority this Thanksgiving to talk with a neighbor or friend who is struggling. God will show you how to be an encouragement to them and in turn you will find that you have many, many things in your life to be thankful for.

Have a happy and healthy Thanksgiving!

Elaine Campbell, MA

Give Thanks

This morning I was preparing a group activity for children that I work with in school. As Thanksgiving is fast approaching, I decided to focus the lesson on gratitude. I think we all can benefit from a reminder to be thankful and grateful.

So many times, there is so  much complaining going on. Complaining is the opposite of being thankful and Numbers 11:1 tells us "Now when the people complained, it displeased the Lord; for the Lord heard it, and His anger was aroused. So the fire of the Lord burned among them, and consumed some in the outskirts of the camp."

Instead the Word instructs us to be thankful. When should we be thankful? According to Hebrews 13:15, we should "...continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to his name." Why should we give thanks? Several scriptures point to the answer to this quesetion:

Oh, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever. ~ Psalm 107:1

But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. ~ I Corinthians 15:57

Now thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and through us diffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place. ~2 Corinthians 2:14

Having a thankful heart helps to bring down strongholds in our lives, like depression, bitterness, and hatred. As I mentioned in the activity that I prepared for the children, gratitude makes a great attitude!

In closing, Let us mediate on 1 Thessalonians 5:18 which says: "In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

~Ann Gantt, Ph.D., LCSW (New Hope Counselor)

Words

I've been thinking lately about the power of words. You may remember that little rhyme we used to say as kids: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." We'd say that to someone who had just said something mean or hurtful to us to let them know that, say what they will, their words will have no effect on us. Really? Is that true? As I have reflected over that childhood verse, I realize actually the opposite is true. The sticks and stones that hit us did hurt us, maybe even broke a bone. However, those wounds have healed and we've moved on. But the hurtful words that were spoken to us, even in jest, often leave wounds that still bleed.

One client told me of his experience growing up at home with his father. My client was the second of two sons, and apparently his father wanted a girl when my client was born, rather than another boy.  This father told his son one day when he was very angry: "I wish you were dead. I always wanted a daughter anyway." That wound still bleeds for my client; he struggles with depression, low self-esteem, abandonment, and anger.

On the other hand, that father could have said to his son: "Son, I am so thankful for you. You are such a blessing from God. I remember the day you were born, and when they told me I have another son, I was thrilled!" What power would those words have in my client's life?

If you're a parent, bless your children through your words. I recall, in the Bible, the story of Jacob and Esau. They were in competition for their father Isaac's blessing, and one day, after his brother, Jacob, had tricked his father into blessing him instead of Esau, Esau cried out: "Bless me too, my father!" That is the cry of every child as they grow up in our homes. They long to be blessed by us as their parents. And we can also bless our marriage partners by affirming them through our words: "I'm so thankful God brought you into my life," or, "Thanks for all the little things you do to make my life great!"

Can you imagine how Christ's disciples felt when he called them his "friends"? That must have been a great blessing to them. I challenge us to bless our children and our spouses with words that strengthen and encourage!

Tom Horst, MA
Marriage and Family Therapist